I need help with motivation… Every year I set goals, and every year I fail them. I start off strong with keeping my resolution but by February, I’ve already failed my New Year’s Resolution. What can I do to stay motivated? I’m tired of letting myself down, but sometimes I feel like I can’t help it because I’m just not motivated to do what I need to do to achieve my goal. – Missing Motivation
My dear Missing Motivation, I cannot tell you how excited I am that you’ve asked this question! Motivation is a funny thing. We are conditioned to believe that motivation is the golden key to helping us reach our goals. That motivation is THE one thing you need to get you to the finish line. But have you ever accomplished a goal because you were motivated 100% of the time?
If the answer to that question is, “Yes” then I’d venture to guess one of the following things was at play. 1. Your goal was small enough that didn’t really push you out of your comfort zone even the slightest bit. Be honest with yourself, was that goal something that pushed you? Probably not. 2. You’ve forgotten the days (even if far and few between) that you did not feel motivated 😏 but continued forward anyway. And that’s just not being honest with yourself, sis!
Let’s Jump Right In!
Let’s have an honest moment here. Are you ready? Motivation is a fickle b***h. That’s right, I said it. If you’re anything like me, motivation never sticks around too long. It’s wonderful when she’s here and I can make a ton of progress! But when she slips out the back door at night for an unknown period of time, my drive comes to a screeching halt.
Can you relate? I know you can!
So, what can you do about it?
Well, the first thing is to admit the truth about motivation. The fact is motivation is never going to be your ride-or-die bestie. It’s NEVER, I repeat, NEVER going to be by your side 24/7. There will be times when you haven’t reached your goals yet, and motivation is nowhere to be found.
But there are things you can do to support your journey that have ZERO to do with motivation. Here are 3 tools you can use to get you through those inevitable times when you just don’t feel that spark!
- Remember WHY you set this goal in the first place. One of the most powerful ways to keep moving forward, even when motivation is present, is to let your WHY drive you forward. If you can tie your goals to a deeper reason, you may be driven to push through even if you don’t feel like it. So, if your goal is to drop weight, think about WHY that’s important to you. Is it because you want to play with your kiddos more easily? Maybe you want to manage an underlying health concern better Is it simply that you want to feel more comfortable in your body? Whatever the reason may be, dig deep and use that to support you.
- Here’s your tough love tip… Sometimes we have to do things we don’t want to. Change is not easy. In fact, our brains are wired to resist change because it’s unknown. Our brains are meant to keep us safe from harm and if it doesn’t know what the outcome will be, it will send up whatever red flags it can to keep you right where you are. AKA (perceived) safety. But you know what? If you give in to the resistance, it will also keep you in a place of complacency. So, ask yourself, “Is where I am better than where I want to be?” If the answer is, “No” then you have to handle business even if you don’t feel like it.
- Rest but don’t give up. We have also been conditioned to think that resting is laziness. It’s not. Resting is absolutely necessary! No one can go 100% all the time. And someday on your journey, you may need to take a moment to rest so that you don’t experience burnout. It’s okay to slow down! It’s important not to stop, though. Resting is not laziness or quitting. They are not the same; they are very different!
- Bonus tip: Get help! There is nothing wrong with leaning on another person who can help you. I have a small but mighty network of people I lean on to help me reach my goals. This includes a coach to help me reach my health goals. I also have a coach to help me with my business goals. Asking for help doesn’t mean you are weak. Read that one again if you need to. Investing in yourself isn’t a bad (or selfish) thing. Leaning on your support system is necessary sometimes to keep yourself accountable for reaching your goals. Sometimes you might need a pro to help support you along the way. A good coach will point you in the right direction, hold space for you, and empower you to use your unique gifts to achieve your version of success. There is no shame in any of this!
Motivation isn’t something you have all the time. This means you cannot rely on it to help you reach your goals. Motivation is like icing on the 🎵 work, work, work, work 🎶 cake you have to chow down on to get to where you want to go. It helps the process but it’s not THE process.
3 tips to help you reach your goals:
- Remind yourself WHY you started this journey in the first place. Tying your goal to a deeper reason can keep you moving forward even when you don’t want to.
- Sometimes we have to do things we don’t want to. This is true of life. I almost never want to go to the doctor but sometimes it’s necessary. I don’t always want to go for a walk or hop on the treadmill for a run, but I also like living in a strong body. Sometimes you just have to do it.
- It’s okay to rest along the way. Most goals aren’t achieved overnight. Resting is an important part of the process and it can prevent burnout. Resting is not laziness and it doesn’t make you a quitter. Quitting is quitting. Know and feel comfortable with the difference.
- Bonus tip: If you can, invest in some help. Sometimes you need someone to hold you accountable and hype you up along the way. A coach is the perfect person for that. A good coach will challenge you to become the best you can be!
Curious to see if a coach can support you? If you’re ready to take the leap and want additional support in reaching your goals, I am here to help! Set up your free discovery call and Let’s work together!
Have a question? Ask Megs!