Ask Megs: Help! My anxiety is holding me back

LG wants to know:

Hi Megs,
How can I overcome my anxieties that are holding me back from leaving my comfort zone? I’m not 100% happy or satisfied with my job, but it’s comfort knowing I have it. My anxiety continues to throw uncertainty my way, any time I muster any kind of confidence in my next move. – LG

Ask Megs Says:

Hey LG,
Firstly, you should know that your feelings of uncertainty are totally normal! Everyone feels uncertain when they are considering making a change in their life. I think for most, at least for me, confidence is a “fake it ‘til you make” type of superpower.

If I were you, I’d get really clear about what my priorities are. Consider what is important to you. What are your non negotiables for your life? From there, you can determine if the anxiety you feel when you consider making your next move is greater than the discomfort you perpetuate by staying in your dissatisfying job. You are meant to be happy, you are meant to have success and satisfaction, you are meant to fulfill your heart’s desires. Does staying in your comfort zone bring you those things? Probably not, or else you wouldn’t be asking this question.

Believe it or not, anxiety around change is a good thing. It’s your brain reminding you to stay sharp because the unknown COULD lead to dangerous situations. It’s been our evolutionary safety net for hundreds of years; it kept us from being eaten alive by predators. So, even though you’re not likely to be eaten alive moving from one cave to another, your anxiety can be a helpful tool because serves as friendly reminder to evaluate your surroundings.

You probably won’t ever completely rid yourself of those feelings, and why would you want to? When you feel those butterflies in your stomach you know you are growing! I do recognize how uncomfortable that pang of anxiety is, though (I feel it often). When I feel anxious about my next goal, I find that reverse engineering it and breaking it down into small steps, helps me feel less paralyzed by my nerves. Even if it means that I have to break my goal down into a million mini steps, I do it. Each step needs to be small enough that I can take action and not feel completely overwhelmed by it.

With all that said, I also rely on my support system to help relieve anxiety. I try to ground myself, whether that’s by taking a yoga class, going for a hike, spending time with a good friend, taking a bath, or scheduling a “tune-up” appointment with my therapist. When you’re making changes in your life that trigger those feelings, be sure to show yourself some grace and partake in self-care. Be fiercely protective of what you need and your boundaries, because you’re pushing yourself to grow.

LG, I hope this helps a little. Enjoy building the life you dream of!
Sending love your way,
~ Megs

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