How would you respond?
You wake up, hop out of bed, grab your coffee, write your affirmations and goals for the day, and get dressed. You are rockin' that bold red lipstick, hipster chic glasses, awesome rocker tee and blazer, [insert that thing you have been hesitant to wear because of what others will think]. You take a quick peek in the mirror before walking down the hall to your office, and think, "Yes girl, you are looking fierce today!"
You get the kiddos off to their virtual learning situation and sit down to your first meeting of the day. You are prepared AF for this meeting!
And then your client/boss/colleague throws you a curveball that you disagree with. You feel your heart rate start to accelerate. Because of zoom, you can SEE yourself start to flush... it creeps up your neck and your cheeks get hot. Your breathing gets quicker. You KNOW this person is not going to be happy with what you are about to say but nonetheless, you hold strong to your plan based on your expertise.
What do you do?
- You spend the rest of the day worrying about your client being mad at you. You carry your stress response with you the rest of the day and even struggle to fall asleep.
- You recognize that you are not responsible for your client's emotions and response to your feedback and continue on with your day.
Are you a superhuman?
If you answered that you recognize you have no control over anyone else but yourself. I hope you feel great pride in that! Removing yourself from the outcome can be quite a challenge for most people and you have found confidence in YOURSELF that many search for. That's big!
If you aren't superhuman and struggle with letting other peoples' reactions go, I have a tip for you! Consider what it would mean if you had made the opposite decision.
In this case, consider how going with the demands of your colleague and ignoring your hard-earned expertise makes you feel. Does that choice align with your integrity? Does it leave you feeling empowered? Which feels better to you? Standing confidently in YOU or going against your expertise to avoid irritating your colleague?
My hope is that you choose YOU. If you need help feeling confident in putting YOU first, (and you haven't done so already) please check out my Mastering your People-Pleasing Tendencies eBook. It's totally free and offers tips and exercises to challenge people-pleasing thought patterns.
So, check it out already! And I'll see you next week.